Wow – it’s been one year since I last drank alcohol or consumed other drugs. It’s been an interesting year. I’ve had tremendous amount of growth and nothing bad happen. I’ve literally changed my entire life, and it’s been hard. I still have things to work on (weight, confidence with women and sexuality, etc) but I’m on track and am pretty happy 😀 The following are changes I can notice about myself:
- My confidence is much higher than ever before (sober).
- I can be my self. No longer do I have to be an actor and have a different face for each person.
- I can ask for help.
- I have positive coping mechanisms.
- I’m not as impulsive.
- I don’t crave drinking or other drugs.
- I’ve got authentic friends now, not just friends to party with.
- I have a relationship with my parents, and two sisters.
- I have money in my bank account.
- I’ve made more friends than the last 5 years combined.
- I’ve dated girls that I actually have an interest in emotionally not just physically.
- I’m beginning to know who I am.
- I have new hobbies (or restarting old ones) such as blogging, soccer, reading, reffing youth soccer, cycling, recovery activism.
- I have a career path in front of me (politics).
- I don’t do stupid shit (usually).
- I’m beginning to like my self and am happy most of the time 🙂
- I’ve gotten rid of (most) toxic relationships.
- I know how to say “no”
- My identity is no longer a clubber/raver/bar goer/party guy. I avoid those places almost completely.
- I did a three-month internship as a lobbyist for a university in Washington D.C.
- I excelled at my internship!
- I’ve gained 30 pounds 😦
- I’m having a 1-year sober anniversary BBQ with friends in recovery.
- I’m comfortable being an atheist in AA.
- I switched from being a Republican to a Democrat after being too fearful of losing my network and having to start over.
Full disclosure: I do miss some things occasionally because I glamorize them. I try not to think about them, and they are just fleeting thoughts. They are the following:
Drunken HookupsCollege Parties (Really boring after an hour)Partying at raves until the sun comes up. I particularly miss the ones I went to when I lived in the Netherlands. (Went to one a few months ago and it was quite boring without alcohol)Posh Night Clubs with Mainstream EDM DJs (Haven’t gone in sobriety. Maybe I will, maybe I won’t, but I imagine they’d be boring too now)Being able to numb my feelings or enhance my feelings through drugs. (For better or worse, it’s much more natural to feel them the way I do now though)Ibiza – the legendary island of the coast of Spain filled with sex, drugs, and the worlds best night clubs and DJs.
I struck them out because I don’t want to glamorize them.
Sober Politico 
This is a great list! I LOVE how you say that these are things only miss because you glamorize them–perfectly said. And, the older I get, the less I glamorize big rave parties (and such) because, well, they only ever WERE fun because of the substance use/abuse, right? For me, anyway… And, sometimes, it’s best to just move on and leave the past as a distant, but good, memory. You did that, and now, you’re doing THIS. xx
That’s right! I went to a rave, with my sponsor, in sobriety and it was not as fun as I remembered. Instead I got to see people there just getting fucked up on drugs/alcohol rather than enjoying the music. I love the music – so I’ll just be listening via my stereo 🙂
I love your lists. It’s hard to not glamorize drinking sometimes because for many of us, it really was fun until it wasn’t fun anymore. Congratulations on one year of sobriety! It’s a fantastic accomplishment!
CONGRATULATIONS!! I remember being so unsure of my “status” after my one year mark…I was no longer considered ‘early recovery’ but still doing an “Relapse Prevention during Early Recovery” speech at the treatment center where I was once a patient…I am not sneaking up on 26 months of sobriety, and I still have no idea about everything in my life…but it’s working, and I’ll figure it out as I go!!
I am *now sneaking up on 26 months…
Thanks for this! I totally feel you on the “status” part. Early recovery is generally designated as the first 2 years. So I’m still in early recovery but have grown so much I’m definitely not a newcomer any longer. But enough with the labels hahah – we are in recovery!
Yes…very much in recovery, and still growing. I don’t remember the exact quote but it is something to the effect of if you aren’t growing you are dying.
Such truth.